Aries Report

"Aries, It’s Time to Channel Your Inner Terminator: Say Hasta La Vista to Boredom and I'll Be Back to Adventure!"

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ChipWitch Today for 27 November, 2023

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 27 November, 2023

Retrograde Report for 27 November, 2023. There are currently 3 planets in retrograde.

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Pisces Report

"Great Scott! Pisces, Time to Flux Your Capacitor: Retrograde in Your Future Brings a Blast from the Past!"

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Aquarius Report

"Aquarius Forecast: 'I find your lack of faith in Mercury Retrograde... disturbing.' Prepare for Galactic-level Miscommunications!"

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Capricorn Report

"Capricorn's Cosmic Forecast: Saturn Plays Hide-and-Seek While Your Inner Goat Leaps Towards Starry Shenanigans!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Sagittarius: Galactic Giggles Ahead! Jupiter's Doing the Jive & Your Arrows Aim for Adventure!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpios: Prepare for a Cosmic Salsa Dance as Mars Mambos into Your Love Life - Might Want to Wax Those Stingers!"

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Libra Report

"Libra Season Approaches: Time to Balance Your Life or Just Your Checkbook?"

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Virgo Report

"Virgo, Time to Tidy Up your Timey-Wimey Stuff: Your Planets are in a Bigger Mess than the Inside of the TARDIS!"

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Leo Report

"Leo, Prepare for Hyperdrive: Star Wars Wookies Predict a Roaring Month of Galactic Adventures and Intergalactic Hairball Challenges!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"Cancer's Forecast: Expect a Starship Load of Cosmic Crabbyness, with a High Probability of Intergalactic Mood Swings!"

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Gemini Report

"Gemini Twins: Prepare for a Cosmic Tag-Team Match with the Stars, or How to Juggle Planetary Mood Swings like a Jedi!"

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Taurus Report

"Taurus, You're Our Only Hope: Prepare for a Galactic Shift in Your Gravitational Pull!"

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Aries Report

"Aries, Mars Called - It Wants its Fiery Temper Back! An Astrological Forecast Full of Galactic Giggles."

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The Moon is moving from Taurus to Gemini

"Hold Onto Your Telescopes, Space Fans! The Moon is Skipping from Taurus to Gemini Like a Caffeinated Flea!"

ChipWitch Today for 26 November, 2023

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 26 November, 2023

Retrograde Report for 26 November, 2023. There are currently 3 planets in retrograde.

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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Pisces Report

"Drokk! Pisces, Prepare for a Cosmic Tsunami of Emotions as Neptune Rides a Hoverboard through Your Sign!"

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Aquarius Report

"Attention Aquarians: The Stars Align, Your Alien Overlord Approves. Time to Ditch the Tin Foil Hat and Embrace the Cosmos!"

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Capricorn Report

"Capricorn, Prepare to Channel Your Inner Cylon: Stargazing Through a Lens of Existential Anarchy and Galactic Shenanigans!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Spacetime Shenanigans Alert! Jupiter's Playing Ping-Pong with your Fortune, Sagittarius!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpio, This Week Your Stars Say 'Get to the Chopper!' - Expect Some High-Flying Changes!"

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Libra Report

"Hasta La Vista, Balance! Libra's Cosmic Forecast Calls for Unstoppable Action!"

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Virgo Report

"Virgo, Brace Thyself: Mercury Retrograde has Nothing on Your Upcoming Battle with the Laundry Pile!"

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Leo Report

"Leo, May the Force Be With You...Because Mercury is in Retrograde and it's About to Get as Tricky as a Death Star Trench Run!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"Interstellar Crab Alert: Cancerians Set to Boldly Go Where No Crab Has Gone Before, Courtesy of Mercury Retrograde!"

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Gemini Report

"Galactic Twins Beware: Mercury in Retrograde Threatens to Misplace Your Other Half!"

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Taurus Report

"Taurus, the Force Be Moo-ving With You: Expect Some Galactic Bull-ishness in Your Near Future!"

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Aries Report

"Extra-Terrestrial Traffic Alert: Aries, Prepare for a Cosmic Conga Line of Planetary Shenanigans!"

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ChipWitch Today for 25 November, 2023

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 25 November, 2023

Retrograde Report for 25 November, 2023. There are currently 3 planets in retrograde.

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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A Black Hole Gobbles Up a Star

A disk of hot gas swirls around a black hole in this illustration from Dec. 20, 2022. A long stream of hot gas on the right, coming from a star that w...

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Pisces Report

"Pisces, Brace Yourselves! The Universe is About to Send You on a Roller Coaster Ride of Emotions...and No, It's Not Because Your Favourite Sci-Fi Show Got Cancelled!"

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Aquarius Report

"Aquarius, Grab Your Snorkel! Love Dives Deeper than a Submarine in the Mariana Trench this Month!"

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Capricorn Report

"Great Scott! Capricorns, Brace Yourselves for a Time-Traveling Cosmic Twist this Month – No Flux Capacitor Required!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Sagittarius, prepare to Boldly Go Where No Archer Has Gone Before... Mercury Retrograde!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpios, Brace Yourselves: Mercury's in Retrograde and it's More Stubborn than Mulder with a Conspiracy Theory!"

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Libra Report

"Attention Libras: Balance Your Scales or Risk Becoming a Galactic Teeter-Totter!"

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Virgo Report

"Virgo Vibes: Get Ready for an Organized Chaos, Cosmic Cleanups and the Supernova of Sensibility!"

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Leo Report

"Leo, Brace Yourself: Your Mane Attraction This Month Is A Cosmic Hairball of Planetary Purr-turbations!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"Cancer Crustaceans, Prepare to Claw Your Way to Glory: The Stars Declare a Shell-Shocking Week Ahead!"

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Gemini Report

"Twins in a Galaxy Far, Far Away: Gemini, Time to Channel Your Inner Leia and Han Solo for an Epic Astrological Adventure!"

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Taurus Report

"Brace Yourselves Taurus, the Constellations are in Retrograde: Expect More Stubbornness than a Cylon Refusing a Software Update!"

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Aries Report

"Aries, Prepare for a Stellar Traffic Jam: Mars in Retrograde Decides to Take a Nap in Your Sign!"

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Mars is moving from Scorpio to Sagittarius

"Mars Ditches Scorpion Roomie for Sagittarian Soiree: Galactic Gossip from Your Star-Gazing Nerd!"

The Moon is moving from Aries to Taurus

"Breaking Moos: Lunar Lunatic Ditches Ram's Rage for Bullish Bliss - Alien to This or Just Another Celestial Shuffle?"

ChipWitch Today for 24 November, 2023

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 24 November, 2023

Retrograde Report for 24 November, 2023. There are currently 3 planets in retrograde.

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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Pisces Report

"Pisces, this week you'll be 'phoning home' to your emotional side more than E.T. on a long-distance call!"

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Aquarius Report

"Aquarius: Prepare for a Cosmic Shower of Nerdy Charm, Quantum Quirks and Starry Shenanigans!"

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Capricorn Report

"Hold Onto Your Horns, Capricorn! Timey-Wimey Stuff Ahead as Saturn Shifts Into Reverse!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Sagittarius, Prepare to Aim Your Cosmic Arrows at the Universe – Just Remember, There's No Reset Button in Space!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpio, You've Got the Force: Now Stop Using it to Open Automatic Doors!"

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Libra Report

"Libra, Get Ready to Flux Capacitor Your Balance! Cosmic Scales Tip in Favor of Extra Cheesy Pizza this Month!"

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Virgo Report

"Virgo, Embrace Your Inner Nerd: Planet Alignment Predicts a Cosmic Confluence of Tidiness, Effortless Efficiency, and UFO Sightings!"

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Leo Report

"Leonine Stardust Chronicles: Brace Yourself for a Cosmic Roar, but Don't Forget to Tidy up your Mane!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"Crustacean Constellation Commotion: Cancer Stars Align for Galactic Game of Tag. Expect Shell-Shocking Changes!"

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Gemini Report

"Twins Alert! Gemini, Prepare for a Cosmic Juggling Act, And Remember, No One Likes a Show-Off!"

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Taurus Report

"Planetary Bull Market: Taurus Grabs Cosmos by the Horns in a High-Stakes Galactic Rodeo!"

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Aries Report

"Brace Yourselves Aries, Mars is in Retrograde: Expect Spontaneous Combustion of Socks and Multiplication of House Plants!"

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ChipWitch Today for 23 November, 2023

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 23 November, 2023

Retrograde Report for 23 November, 2023. There are currently 3 planets in retrograde.

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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A Space Station Thanksgiving

NASA astronauts Michael Hopkins (left) and Rick Mastracchio, both Expedition 38 flight engineers, pose for a photo with a Thanksgiving meal in the Uni...

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Pisces Report

"Pisces: Prepare to Dive Deep into the Cosmic Sea, But Don't Forget Your Galactic Snorkel!"

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Aquarius Report

"Aquarius Forecast: Expect Cosmic Showers of Inspiration - Don't Forget Your Celestial Umbrella!"

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Capricorn Report

"Capricorn: Brace For Impact As Saturn Sends You More Homework Than a Quantum Physics Major!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Neo Called, Sagittarius! He Said to 'Dodge This' Mercury Retrograde Like You're Dodging Bullets in Slow-Mo!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpio, Brace Yourselves! The Universe is About to Serve Some Galactic Humble Pie with a Side of Cosmic Sarcasm!"

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Libra Report

"Libra, Use the Balance! Galaxy-Scale Decisions Await You!"

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Virgo Report

"Virgo, Prepare to Organize the Cosmos: Your Spreadsheet Skills are About to Become Galactic!"

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Leo Report

"EXTERMINATE SELF-DOUBT, LEO! PLANETARY ALIGNMENT SETS STAGE FOR DOMINATION...OF YOUR TO-DO LIST!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"EXTERMINATE! YOUR FEAR, DEAR CANCER - VENUS IS IN RETROGRADE, NOT YOUR LOVE LIFE!"

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Gemini Report

"Geminis Brace for Cosmic Twister: Doppelgänger Alert as Mercury Plays Peekaboo with Uranus!"

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Taurus Report

"Beware, Taurus! Venus Has a Crush on You: Cosmic Love Triangle Ensues!"

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Aries Report

"Aries Rams Ahead: Brace for Impact or Enjoy the Ride - Either Way, Hold onto Your Asteroids!"

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The Moon is moving from Pisces to Aries

"Rejoice, Space Cadets! The Moon is Ditching Its Fishy Pajamas for Some Fiery Ram Horns!"

The Sun is moving from Scorpio to Sagittarius

"Sun Ditches Scorpio Faster than the Millennium Falcon, Sagittarius Grabs the Lightsaber Next!"

ChipWitch Today for 22 November, 2023

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 22 November, 2023

Retrograde Report for 22 November, 2023. There are currently 3 planets in retrograde.

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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Astronaut Nicole Mann Prepares for Spacewalk

NASA astronaut and Expedition 68 flight engineer Nicole Mann is pictured during a fit check of her spacesuit ahead of a planned spacewalk to upgrade t...

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Pisces Report

"Pisces, Prepare to Swim in Cosmic Soup! Neptune's Serving Extra Stardust Sprinkles!"

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Aquarius Report

"Beam Me Up, 'Quarius! It's Time to Exceed Warp Speed on the Love Planet Venus!"

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Capricorn Report

"Capricorn: Time to Scale the Mountain of Success, or Just Binge Watch Star Trek? The Stars Weigh In!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Sagittarius, May the Force of Jupiter Be With You: Expect Galactic Shifts and Light-Speed Love Adventures!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpio, Prepare to 'Be Back' this Month: Astrological Forecast Predicts a Resurgence of Your Inner Cyborg!"

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Libra Report

"Libra, Brace Yourselves: The Stars Predict a Balance Overload. Oh Dear, Not Another Harmony Lesson!"

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Virgo Report

"Virgo: Expect a Nebula of Nerdiness This Week - Even Pluto's Heart Might Not Be As Cold As Your Ex's!"

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Leo Report

"Leos, Prepare for the Sudden Urge to Roar: Your Main Mane Event is Here! Mars Enters Leo, It's Not Science Fiction, it's Astro-Reality!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"Cancer, Brace Yourself: Gandalf Predicts a Shadowy Retrograde; You Shall Not Pass Without Laughing!"

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Gemini Report

"Get Ready, Gemini: 'I'll Be Back' - Your Retrograde Exes in Full Terminator Mode!"

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Taurus Report

"Beam Me Up, Bull! Taurus, It's Time to Moove Past That Black Hole of Stubbornness!"

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Aries Report

"Battle Stations, Aries! Mars is in Retrograde and It's Throwing More Curveballs than a Nervous Physics Student at a Baseball Game!"

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ChipWitch Today for 21 November, 2023

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 21 November, 2023

Retrograde Report for 21 November, 2023. There are currently 3 planets in retrograde.

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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Seeing Sagittarius C in a New Light

The NIRCam (Near-Infrared Camera) instrument on NASA’s James Webb Space Telescope’s reveals a portion of the Milky Way’s dense core in a new light. An...

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Pisces Report

"Pisces, Hold on to Your Fishy Fins! Retrograde is Coming, So Prepare for a Celestial Rollercoaster of Emotions… and Beware of Misplacing Your Keys!"

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Aquarius Report

"Aquarius, Get Ready to Juggle Planets: It's 'Einstein Meets Cirque du Soleil' in Your Chart This Month!"

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Capricorn Report

"Capricorn, Brace Your Goats: Your Stars are Plotting a Galactic Rebellion!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Sagittarius, Prepare to Embark on an Epic Quest! Brace for Impact with Mysterious Planets and Beware of Rogue Black Holes!"

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