Virgo Report

"Virgos Unite! Galactic Cleanliness Campaign Begins as Stars Align, Dust Bunnies Beware!"

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Leo Report

"Leo, brace yourselves for a cosmic catwalk! As the stars align like a celestial ensemble, it's time to unleash your inner space lion and roar through the galaxy of love and laughter!" 🦁✨

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leo

Cancer Report

"Crabby Cancers Rejoice! Stellar Alignment Unleashes Intergalactic Good Vibes, Unlocking Your Inner Goa'uld and Ascending Your Cosmic Chill Factor!"

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Gemini Report

"Double Trouble: Gemini's Celestial Shenanigans Unleash an Epidemic of UFO Sightings and Rebooted '90s Mullets"

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Taurus Report

"Taureans, Brace Yourselves for Cosmic Cow-tastrophe: Even Maria the Robot Predicts Udder Chaos in Your Stars!"

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Aries Report

"Yee-haw, Aries! Hold onto your space pants as cosmic rodeo kicks into high gear this month!"

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The Moon is moving from Taurus to Gemini

"Beam me up, Moon-y! Taurus takes a cosmic hike as Gemini twins take the lunar reins, Stargate-style!"

ChipWitch Today for 22 April, 2023

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 22 April, 2023

Retrograde Report for 22 April, 2023. There is currently only one planet in retrograde.

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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Pisces Report

"Ahoy Pisces, mates! Dive into the cosmic sea as Neptune sprinkles fairy dust on your fins, and Uranus brings Wi-Fi to your underwater lair!"

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Aquarius Report

"Oi, Aquarians! Brace Yourselves for Smegging Cosmic Waves, as the Stars Align for a Stellar Trip through Space-Time and Funky Vibes!"

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Capricorn Report

"Oi, Capricorns! Brace Yourselves for a Cosmic Conundrum: When Planets Align, Even Your Goat Powers Can't Resist a Wibbly-Wobbly Timey-Wimey Dance!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Sagittarius, prepare for a cosmic curry of chaos: Planets align like vindaloo particles, so hold onto your space pants and brace for interstellar indigestion!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpio, Stardate 2022: Prepare for Cosmic Love, Planetary Passion, and a Beam of Good Fortune - Set Phasers to Stunning!"

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Libra Report

"Libra: Find Balance or We'll Send You to the Brig! Cosmic Scales Demand Justice and Frakkin' Good Vibes"

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Virgo Report

"Virgo, you're The One! Find your inner Neo and dodge cosmic bullets in this week's Astrological Forecast - Matrix Edition!"

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Leo Report

"Leos, Prepare for a Roar-some Week: Cosmic Catnip Aligns the Stars as Babylon 5's Zathras Predicts a Purr-fectly Hilarious Time Ahead!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"Cancerian Crustaceans! Prepare to Scuttle Hilariously through the Cosmic Tides of Destiny as Galactic Shenanigans Unfold!"

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Gemini Report

"Double Trouble: Gemini's Twin Personalities Unleash a Cosmic Comedy of Errors, as Scully Seeks the Missing Truth on the Celestial Plane!"

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Taurus Report

"Attention Taurus Bulls: Alien Infiltration Alert! Your Cosmic Vibes Might Just Shape-Shift the Universe this Month – or at Least Your Love Life!"

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Aries Report

"Intergalactic Aries Assemble: Prepare for a Smegging Cosmic Roller Coaster of Love, Laughs, and Laser Show Lunacy!"

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ChipWitch Today for 21 April, 2023

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 21 April, 2023

Retrograde Report for 21 April, 2023. There are no planets in retrograde!

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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SuperBIT Sees Colliding Antennae Galaxies

This view of the Antennae Galaxies, two large galaxies colliding 60 million light-years away, is one of the first research images from the Super Press...

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NASA's New 3D-Printed Superalloy Can Take the Heat

NASA has demonstrated a breakthrough in 3D printable high-temperature materials that could lead to stronger, more durable parts for airplanes and spac...

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Pisces Report

"Pisces, prepare to swim through a cosmic sea of groovy galactic vibes: Neptune's tidal waves bring psychedelic revelations and funky retrograde dance moves!"

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Aquarius Report

"Frakkin' Stars Align: Aquarius to Experience a Cosmic Cyclone of Quirky Vibes and Nerdtastic Revelations!"

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Capricorn Report

"Capricorn Commanders, Prepare to Launch: Galactic Giggles and Cosmic Cuddles Await in Your Astrological Almanac Adventure!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Strap in, Sagittarius: Your Horoscope is Bursting with Adventure Like an Alien from John Hurt's Chest!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpio Forecast: Feel the Cosmic Force, Hairy Wookies! Love, Adventure, and Hairballs Await!"

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Libra Report

"Libra, Balance Your Scales or Spoilers! Expect a Cosmic Conga Line of Planetary Shenanigans!"

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Virgo Report

"Virgo Vibes: Planetary Puns, Quantum Quirks, and Astral Awesomeness Unveiled as Mercury Goes Retrograde - Get Ready to Rock Your Socks Off with Cosmic Comedy!"

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Leo Report

"Leo's Cosmic Roar: When Lionhearted Leos Embrace Science, the Galactic Catnip Effect Unleashes a Meowniverse of Possibilities!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"HAL 9000 Predicts: Cancer's Stars Align for a Groovy Cosmic Trip Through the Galactic Rollercoaster of Emotions – Just Don't Forget Your Tie-Dye Spacesuit!"

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Gemini Report

"Double the Twins, Double the Grins: Gemini's Comedy of Errors in Retrograde Sends the Universe into Hysterical Laughter!"

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Taurus Report

"Recharge Your Bull-erina Batteries: Taurus to Waltz with Cosmic Energies in a Stellar Tango!" 🤖✨

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The Sun is moving from Aries to Taurus

"Bovine Blitz: The Sun Shifts from Ram-Page to Taurean Turf, Prepare for Galactic Grazing – A Gaius Baltar Exclusive!"

ChipWitch Today for 20 April, 2023

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 20 April, 2023

Retrograde Report for 20 April, 2023. There are no planets in retrograde!

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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Martian Milestone for Ingenuity

This April 16, 2023, enhanced color image of NASA's Ingenuity Mars Helicopter is the clearest view of the rotorcraft since its first flight.

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Pisces Report

"Pisces, the Galactic Fish Duo, Set to Tangle Their Cosmic Fins: A Hilariously Chaotic Dance of Destiny and Daydreams in Zero Gravity!"

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Aquarius Report

"Attention Aquarians: Buckle up your moon boots and polish those crystals! Galactic giggles and cosmic conundrums await you in this week's far-out forecast!"

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Capricorn Report

"Capricorn, Unleash Your Inner Goat: Climb the Mountain of Success with Cosmic Recycling Powers!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Sagittarius, Prepare to Channel Your Inner Smeghead: A Cosmic Comedy of Galactic Proportions Awaits You!"

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The Sun is moving from Aries to Taurus

"Wall-E Exclusive: Solar Bull on the Loose! Sun Ditches Ram and Cuddles Up to Taurus, Prepare for Earthy Vibes!"

Scorpio Report

"Scorpio, this week you'll face your fears like a Xenomorph on caffeine: unexpected, fast, and with a side of slime!"

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Libra Report

"Libra, the Cosmic Scale Swings: Will Justice Prevail or Will Your Inner Nerd Rule the Galaxy? Find Out in This Astronomically Hilarious Forecast!"

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Virgo Report

"Virgo: This Month's Forecast – Replicants or Not, Your Perfectionism's Gonna Get You!"

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Leo Report

"Leo, prepare for the cosmic catwalk: strut your star-studded mane as planetary alignments purr-fectly groom your magnetic aura. Trust no one but your horoscope!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"These Aren't the Crabs You're Looking For: Cancer's Astrological Forecast Strikes Back with Galactic Giggles and Cosmic Cuddles"

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